Category Archives: Commercial Fishing Family
In Search of a Pot of Crab Gold
George texted me a beautiful picture from Westport, Washington, of a rainbow off the stern of the f/v Vis, taken late afternoon today.
Actually, he sent it to our family texting group after I informed everyone in the group that it was National Margarita Day.
Not a tequila fan, myself, I’ll gladly settle for a glass or two of good red wine to end what has been a beautiful winter day.
Not to be outdone by a rainbow, however, is Miss Valerie, dressed in her Dungeness crab outfit. Val’s outfit is so cute, and the rainbow so beautiful, that I’m sure the pot of crab gold must surely be around the crab corner in good ole’ Westport.
Happy Margarita Day! Cheers.
And Sweet Baby Valerie Makes Five.
Valerie Joy
You may have guessed, based on the amount of time that has gone by since my last post, that our precious baby Valerie Joy has indeed been born. She decided to make a very rapid appearance on January 19, 2012 and was born in literally a matter of minutes! Valerie is a tiny little thing who weighed just 6 pounds, 5.8 ounces at birth and measured 19 inches long.
While at the hospital, she dropped down to 5 pounds 8 ounces, but within just a couple of days was right back up to her birth weight. So far, she is a very mild baby who sleeps quite a bit; and thank goodness for that, because each time she sleeps, I race to my bed and sleep as well.
George was home for the birth (although ironically, he almost missed it; he was eating lunch in the cafeteria with my dad, Eva, and Vincent when Valerie suddenly decided to burst forth. Boy, was he shocked when he ambled back into our room and realized what was transpiring!). George even got to stay for two extra days with me at the hospital thanks to a storm and its accompanying twenty-foot seas that kept the crab boats in the harbor on the official start of the Dungeness crab season.
Sadly, George did leave over a week ago and the kids and I have been holding down the fort. We have had lots of amazing help from my family and friends; everything from school pick-ups and drop-offs, to meals, the sharing of baby supplies, the folding of laundry, and even a slumber party for the kids at the home of our friends.
All of this help has been a surprise and a blessing. I don’t know what I would have done here with a newborn, two other little ones adjusting to not only the arrival of a baby sister but also the departure of their dad, and a household of chores that need to be kept on top of without such help offered to me.
We are off to a good start thanks to so many. George and I also enjoyed some pleasant and uninterrupted time together at the hospital before he left which allowed us to reconnect with each other, enjoy the blessing of Valerie, and get our new family of five off to a positive and peaceful start. I will never forget how sweet it was to spend that time with him in total relief that Valerie had finally arrived safely and soundly, and be able to let go of the worry and anxiety that defined the pregnancy.
I feel such physical and mental relief, such gratitude, the likes of which I’ve rarely felt on this level. My heart sings and leaps for joy each time I look around me and see these three amazing little blessings that God somehow saw fit to allow me to love, cherish, and raise. Astonishing.
Eva holding Valerie at the hospital; her dream come true at last.
Vincent and Valerie. My sweet buddy is slowly adjusting.
Eva swaddled her pink bear.
May the Dungeness Crab and Baby Party Begin Already!
The boat left with a load of Dungeness crab pots last weekend. Although it is always sad to hug G goodbye and wave the crew off, it’s also kind of a relief. Especially this year. There has been so much waiting, wondering, and anticipation as to when the gear work will end, when the boat will leave for Westport, when the season will start, and if the weather will cooperate.
And of course, this year we have the added anticipation of a baby due on the exact day George and the fellas will dump five-hundred crab pots to the bottom of the ocean, hoping the season will be profitable and safe for the five families—including at least a dozen children combined—who are relying on it.
No pressure!
Ah, what can you do? That’s life, moving forward the way life tends to do.
Here are a few pictures of this year’s Dungeness Crab Season 2012 Departure Day:
What an awesome, sweet, and tough crew we have in Bryan, Johnny, Brett, Oscar, and George.
Precious and resilient commercial fishing kids watching Dad pull away from the dock.
Johnny on top of the pots.
George will have a few days at home in between getting the boat to Westport and when the season officially begins, so here’s still hoping the baby decides to arrive during the window in which he is home.
I’m ready.
The kids’ bedroom switch and redesign is complete; Vincent has cool new bunk beds, Eva has her rainbow/butterfly/flower room. Holidays are over, children are back in school, preschool, and activities. House is clean, Christmas presents are put away, writing invoices have been sent off.
I’m tired of waiting; I’m looking ahead already to springtime, capris, sandals, renewed energy, evenings of sunshine and bayside cocktails, and a body I can actually move with ease and feel comfortable within.
Time to get this party started! :)
I love this picture of Vincent; he looks like he just climbed off a Dutch Harbor fishing vessel.
Goodbye, 2011. Great to Finally Meet You, 2012.
I just hung up my new 2012 kitchen wall calendar and deposited the 2011 edition into the recycling bin. I have to say—I am not sorry to see 2011 go.
It’s not that it has been a bad year; for the most part, it moved along just fine. When I look back, I’m incredibly grateful for the health of my kids and family and a good year of fishing and safety for George and the crew. We had a couple of fun trips; Las Vegas in March and Kauai in April, and plans to start making vacations a more regular part of our routine after not taking any for years.
But then I remember the way our beloved pitbull, Toby, died suddenly last April (the day before we left on our first family vacation in five years) after successfully and healthily beating a cancer diagnosis for three years. George left for Alaska and the halibut/blackcod longlining season soon after, and then shortly after that, I discovered we were unexpectedly expecting again.
Pregnancy sickness lasted throughout the summer, fall, and now into winter, making the challenge of being a seasonally single commercial fishing mom much more difficult than it really needs to be.
I have to say that after dealing with a variety of doctors, various medical offices and front desk staff, nurses, opinions, test results, and appointments for the past nine months, I would be happy to never, ever have to step foot in an office or deal with anyone in the medical profession ever again. I plan to write a much longer essay on the topic later, after I’ve had some distance and can gain perspective on this experience, but for now, all I can think is that I want this to be over.
The good news is that in eighteen days (if not sooner), it will be. Assuming all goes well with delivery and the first few months with baby at home, I will so grateful to have my life, my body, and my peace of mind back.
On the other hand, I now have a better appreciation and empathy for patients who struggle with chronic illness, who are told they have medical issues, troubles that can’t be diagnosed or treated effectively, who are not listened to or treated well by the medical profession, and who must attend appointment after appointment and try to stay pleasant all the while.
I’ve written before that after struggling with the physical, mental, and emotional effects of infertility before we were blessed with our Eva and Vincent, I never dreamed I would have a third baby years later. I also never imagined that after such a wonderful experience with the one doctor who saw me through those first two amazing pregnancies, this final surprise would be so different.
I’m going to spend these last two weeks trying to stay calm, looking forward to delivery, and then getting on with caring for a newborn and my two other children and letting the experience of the past nine months fade away in time.
Moving forward and beyond is something I love to do, and I’m excited and eager to make 2012 a great year.
So, we’ll have this baby girl in January, and then in the spring I will be launching my first e-book right here on this blog and via Kindle and other e-reader formats. Details on the e-book will come in the following months, but I am extremely excited about this new project. The book is currently in design and editing stages and I know it will be something I’m proud of and that many of my readers will find useful.
Speaking of blog readers; thank you to all for making 2011 a record year on Highliners and Homecomings. It’s been fun reviewing blog statistics, reading your comments, keeping an eye on subscriptions, seeing which posts get the most “hits” and which pictures get clicked on the most, reviewing where traffic is coming from and watching numbers rise.
As we head into the fifth year, I want to sincerely thank you so much for the support and the time you take to come over and see or read what’s new.
The best to you as we start this new year—health and happiness to all.
Someone posted this on Facebook. It's not the most eloquent wording, but I think it's a sentiment worth keeping in mind.
Relying on Grace.
We knew December was going to be a tough month around here; getting ready for the Dungeness crab season, celebrating Eva’s sixth birthday, preparing for Christmas, entering the final weeks of pregnancy, and doing a major bedroom overhaul here at home was never going to be smooth or easy.
Unfortunately, we had no choice but to do everything in four short weeks and it has been as overwhelming and tiring as we anticipated. There have been some highlights; our friend and neighbor’s help with the room switch, Eva’s birthday party turning out better than I’d hoped, and receiving Christmas cards from friends and family have all been little spurts of joy throughout.
I’m probably a little more burned out than usual because I’m on new medication for the last four weeks of this pregnancy that makes me nauseous and tired. Of course, I’ve felt that way from the very beginning so it’s not a real change for me…just that I’d hoped for some relief before the birth.
At one of my three-times-a-week doctor appointments, I finally asked one of the nurses why this pregnancy has been so much more difficult than the others.
Is it my age? Is it the being watched like a hawk by medical staff that’s a spirit-dampener? Is it the mental challenge for someone who doesn’t deal well with surprise or change? Is it from exhaustion having two energetic children already at home? The physical strain of a third pregnancy?
Most likely, it’s all of it. There is really nothing to do but see the rest of these few weeks out with as much grace as possible and hope for the best when it’s time to deliver.
Speaking of which; we still don’t know whether George will be here for the event. As you know, the baby is due on January 25. We finally received word that the official start date for the Dungeness crab season is January 24. For those of you that don’t know, that means they’ll set gear (dump 500 crab pots) about three days before, which is January 21. In order to get to the boat and out to the middle of the ocean, George will leave home on January 19.
My best hope is that the baby up and decides to make her way out by herself on January 15.
We do have an alternate captain scheduled to take the wheel and relieve George for a couple of weeks during the crab season, but George absolutely has to be there for the first setting of 500 crab pots. There are hundreds of thousands of dollars at stake, the safety of crew, and several families with children all depending upon getting the season off to the best financial and safest start possible.
If the crab season had begun when it usually does, around the first of January, George could have set the first critical round of pots, got the season started, and then handed it off to the relief captain and come home for the baby.
However, the season starting so late in the month put a big wrench in that plan. As I said, all I can do is stay calm, have a plan in place, and try to see these last few weeks through with as much grace as I can muster.
I want to take a minute and pay a small blog tribute to my old Southeast Alaska fishing friend, Monte, who passed away suddenly and tragically this week of a heart attack at the age of thirty-two. Upon learning this news, I literally doubled over and sobbed, unable to believe or comprehend what happened. I was sure my eyes were tricking me, that it was some terrible joke or hoax.
Of course, it wasn’t.
Monte, who leaves behind a wife and six-month-old baby, was the sweetest, toughest, kindest, most original character you’d be lucky to know. At his funeral yesterday, I think everyone felt comfort that the music, stories, pictures, and video perfectly captured Monte’s authentic spirit and person. His love of fishing, the outdoors, creativity, wife, baby, friends, and helpful nature were all represented at his final departure from shore.
Rest in peace, dear Monte. You will never be forgotten.
The Launching of Dungeness Crab Pots AND a New Baby. All at the Same Time. Literally.
George told me today that the Washington Dungeness Crab Fishermen’s Association has a new Facebook page, so I immediately went over and “liked” it. I did some looking around while I was there and could see right away what a great page it is. Updates on the season and the fleet are regular, and Washington Dungeness crab fishermen are also encouraged to post boat and crew pictures.
I love a positive and informative commercial fishing-themed Facebook page (if you do too, check out Commercial Fishing Families & Friends, the Facebook group I started with a couple other commercial fishing wives), so it’s great that the WDCFA has joined the fun.
Speaking of Washington Dungeness crab fishing, George went to a meeting this morning for an update on the season’s start date. We’ve known for a while that the season is going to begin either (roughly) January 15 or January 25. I eagerly awaited word all day as to the firm date, but the only new thing I learned was that we’d all know in 48 hours what the final and official start date will be.
Now, I normally do not get too hung up on the start date of crab season. I know it’s always sometime between December and January, and I just hope each year that G will be around for Christmas. I was a little nervous six years ago when I was expecting Eva, but George was able to be here for her birth on December 12 before leaving shortly after.
A crab season start date of either January 15 or January 25 does not do me any personal good, as that is the exact date range that our third baby is due. Seriously—I’m not kidding. Her due date is January 25 and she will likely be encouraged out slightly before then, hence, the January 15-25 range.
So, I will be waiting impatiently for the next two days until we found out exactly what we’re looking at. I do have plans in case there is no way G can be here; my parents are on board to help with my two children and dog, and I have three friends lined up to keep me company at the hospital and some more who have offered to help following the birth, but it’s still a messed-up situation.
If a five-to-seven-day coastal storm blows through around the due date, making it impossible to crab, that would help. If not, I’ll cross my fingers for a different kind of miracle. Hey, my dad rushed in from salmon fishing in Puget Sound just in time to make it for my birth, and I know someone else who managed to take a sea plane off of his boat in Alaska, fly to shore, get to the airport, fly two hours to his home state, rent a car, drive two more hours home, and made it in time for the delivery of his daughter.
I overheard George talking with Brett today about all of this.
“I’m in a bit of a pickle,” George said.
Um, yes. That’s one way of putting it.
Fingers crossed!
Just a few short weeks left to go! I also received a 3D video today of the baby moving around and looking cute.
Another Great Time at Pacific Marine Expo 2011!
Attending Pacific Marine Expo (also known as Fish Expo) each year is as much a fall tradition in our family as Thanksgiving dinner or choosing a Christmas tree. It is the perfect way for us to kick off the holiday and Dungeness crab seasons, and we always leave the event looking forward to and pumped about all that lies ahead.
This year’s PME brimmed with heightened energy and cheer. There were more vendors than ever, the freebies at each booth were awesome, and almost the entire crew from National Fisherman magazine came out to publish the Show Daily after the show publication was put on hiatus for a couple of years.
I was excited to see the Show Daily back in effect because I have great memories of a decade ago when I ran around the Convention Center with my recorder and notebook, attending PME workshops and listening to speakers, taking notes, then running upstairs to sit down and type it all up into short news bits for the Daily.
I can’t believe what little-to-no-turnover occurs with the editing, publishing, and art gang at National Fisherman. Seriously. Even after ten years, I still see Jerry, Linc, Jen, Michael, and Michael at Fish Expo. These are the original characters that were in place when Jerry Fraser first gave me my fiFrst professional writing gig as a correspondent for the magazine long ago!
So, I feel pretty okay when I see Jerry in the NF booth at PME and make my annual pitch for work I’d like to do or see in the magazine.
“Hey, how’s it going?!” I say. “Great! It’s good! Yep, here’s Eva and Vincent. George is around here somewhere. Yes, Dad’s here, too! I know, crazy, another one on the way, huh? Say, about what we talked about last year, here’s what I was thinking…”
I try Linc next.
“Hey, Linc! Longtime no see! Remember when we ordered those Cosmopolitans years ago? Mmm, those were good. Hey, what do you think about this idea I’ve been working on….?”
I see Jes, who actually took over as senior editor of NF last year.
“Jes! Hi! Great to see you. Magazine looks good! Yep, pregnant! Due in only eight more weeks! Can’t wait! Hey, I wanted to get in touch with you about this thing I’ve been tossing around….”
Then I have a laugh.
“No? Still not interested? That’s okay. I’ll be back again next year!”
We spent all day at PME and saw fishermen we knew, a neighbor or two, a relative, some of George’s longtime/sometime business partners (along with the spec sheet for the new $10 million Bering Sea longliner they’re having built).
We also ran into one of our favorites, Fred Wahl, along with his lovely wife. Of course, Fred Wahl and National Fisherman magazine is how George and I first met. You can read more about that here.
“There they are!” Fred called in our direction when we spotted each other across the aisle. “No strollers this year, eh?” he asked.
That’s when I pointed to my seven-months pregnant tummy.
“Ah!” he said.
The children also had a great time and were incredibly well-behaved. Their first stop was the Xtra Tuff booth, where Eva and Vincent received their free pair of Xtra Tuff boots. They also got t-shirts and red cups at the booth this year, and I came away with two luggage tags made out of my business cards.
George scored a free hooded sweatshirt and ball cap from the Redden Marine Supply booth, I went around collecting tons of pens, and the children collected candy, flashlights, and keychains. George also scooped up lots of tablets with lined paper (including one with his favorite…graph paper!).
The guys at the Toyota Industries booth were especially kind; they let Eva and Vincent sit inside the enclosed forklifts pushing buttons, honking horns, and pulling levers for the better part of an hour. Vincent also had a good time helping the ice-maker demonstration folks pick up renegade ice from the floor.
We spotted a fancy Porsche in the parking garage on our way into the show and again on our way out. “Must be a Deadliest Catch guy,” we said to each other. When I spotted a fellow wearing a Time Bandit jacket during the show, I did wonder for a moment if that Porsche belonged to him!
A great day for all, to be sure. Can’t wait for next year. Even if we’ll be hauling the stroller back out. :)
Operation Christmas Child–A Gift For Everyone.
It comes as no surprise to anyone who knows me, or who has ever read this blog, that I am in love with and so proud of my children. That’s not to say we are always well-behaved or that we don’t test boundaries, ignore rules, or make unwise choices. Of course we do! But I am always proud of their sweetness, their caring hearts, and their desire to do nice things and to love people.
This year at a church event, we learned about Operation Christmas Child, a program in which you obtain an empty shoe box and fill it with gifts to send to a boy or girl somewhere around the world for Christmas. Boxes were provided at the event, so we grabbed two of them. Vincent was responsible for choosing gifts for a boy between the ages of two and four, and Eva became responsible for selecting gifts for a girl between the ages of five and nine.
We went shopping this weekend and each of my children chose gifts they thought a boy and girl would love. They selected hair barrettes, hot wheels, chapstick, toothpaste, toothbrushes, stuffed animals, blankets, colorful socks, and rubber lizards for their boxes. At home, we packed the boxes, printed out labels, and waited for this morning when we took them to church and the kids carried them in to place on a table growing with similar boxes.
I was nearly brought to tears several times this weekend as I watched how excited Eva and Vincent were to choose things for someone across the world, close to their ages, who did not have “as much” in the way of toys and the like as they did. Surprisingly, my children never asked for anything for themselves as we chose gifts for their boxes, and they couldn’t wait to proudly, and with huge smiles, carry their boxes into church.
I tallied up the cost and discovered that each box held $35 worth of product. Of course, that amount could have varied in either direction, depending on where one chose to shop. Now, I’m no math whiz (I was an English major!) but a total of $70 seemed pretty darn reasonable, and worth every penny. When I fill up my vehicle with gas, it costs $70. I took the kids to lunch after we did our box shopping, and that cost $20. We went to the mall, where I dropped way too much money on face and hair products.
Keeping the gift box tally in mind compared to what we spend in an average day was a real eye opener for me.
We aren’t strangers to local and global giving around here, but most of our giving is done anonymously or to places we don’t see the impact first hand or know exactly where the money is going. We sponsor a low-income family in town, contribute to young single mothers, volunteer with a no-kill animal shelter, and George gives to Boy Scouts and the Smile Train. But these are things—except for the animal shelter—for which we simply write checks and never actually see impact.
To see my kids smiling and thoughtfully choosing gifts for other children, to print out labels and watch Eva tape them to the boxes, to look forward to tracking the packages to see where they end up, imagining what joy $35 will bring to each child…incredible.
If you have $15 or $30 lying around, consider grabbing a shoe box and filling it up to send across the world through Operation Christmas Child. Drop off for the boxes runs until November 21!
Eva waiting to pack her box that will be sent to a little girl between the ages of five and nine years old somewhere across the world.
Vincent giving two thumbs up for the box he created that will be delivered to a boy aged 2-4 years in a foreign country.
On the way in to church, a drop-off location for the kids' Operation Christmas Child boxes.
Eva and Vincent were all smiles as they added their boxes to the growing pile on the table. We tracked the gift tags so we'll know to which country their boxes will arrive.
Love Kingergarten, Hate the Kindergarten Rat Race.
This has been the most peaceful day I’ve had since school started…and oddly, it’s been an awesome day in part because there was no school today. I went to bed last night looking so forward to this morning because I knew we wouldn’t have to rush, rush, rush everyone to “get dressed” and “eat breakfast” and “gather backpacks” and “remember lunches” and hustle everyone out the door, down the stairs, and into the car.
Just like the good ole days, the kids and I got up early but we took the morning slow and easy. No rushing, no panic, no last-minute remembering, no racing. We went to Jazzercise all together, saw our friends, went out for breakfast, and then came home. Later this afternoon we made popcorn, put in a movie, and listened to hail pound against the windows and watched the tree limbs going nuts outside during a perfect fall storm.
I tell you, I just can’t stand all-day, every day kindergarten. I really wish that it was a full day but just three days a week, leaving a mother two week days to spend with her little ones exactly as she (and they) wish. I knew that adjusting to a daily 9-5 school grind was going to be a challenge for this commercial fishing mom and family, and it is.
Getting up early is not a problem, but I find hustling and strict schedules really annoying. Be at school by 8:20 each and every morning of the week…or else. Be at the bus stop by this time in the afternoon…or else. Yesterday, I saw that we were going to be late to school and instead of rushing and ordering my kids around, I chose instead to call Eva’s school.
“Eva will be at school at 9 this morning,” I announced. I know that being late is not a good precedent to set for your children, but I weighed the odds and decided to make the call. Hey, these are my kids, not the school’s. They are still little, I’m seven months pregnant, and darn it, I just did not feel like hurrying everyone.
I cannot wait for the holiday season to get into full swing. I am looking forward to a few days off at Thanksgiving and a couple weeks at Christmas with the children so we can have more time to play and relax and not make every day about being on time, dropping off, picking up, eating dinner, and going to bed. They are only four and five years old! And soon, we will have an infant in tow. How did we become part of the workday grind along with working adults?
The school district and most parents absolutely love all-day, every day kindergarten and I’m well aware that my view on the matter is in the minority. I understand the reasoning for the school district implementing all-day, every day kindergarten and I’ve listened to and read all of the arguments on both sides. But this is my blog and I can spout my opinion here…so here it is. I am one mom who does not like it. At all.
I’m glad that today, for one day during the week, we got a break from the elementary school rat race and I had both of my children home to spend time with and enjoy.
Speaking of the holiday season (and moving on from the topic of school—it is Friday, after all!)…it’s not only the holiday season, but it’s pre-Dungeness crab season, too! G and the crew are on the boat working hard each day getting it all ready to go. George has been working on the boat by himself for the last two months, so I love it when the crew rolls into town with their help.
Here are a few pictures of the last couple weeks…
First things first, get the boat back in the water.
Quick time out to celebrate Halloween and go trick or treating…
Back on the boat to keep getting ready for the crab season…
Foster a precious pitbull named Ryder….
Dream of next spring’s Florida or Hawaiian beach vacation, as Eva and her iPhone sketches seem to be doing as well.
Poor Me, Poor Me, Pour Me a Drink…
Friday iPhone Fun almost didn’t happen at the Schile house. Yesterday morning as I was leaving to take Eva to kindergarten, Vincent to preschool, and myself to teach Jazzercise, G announced that he wasn’t going to be able to meet me at the AT&T store that afternoon.
“Wait,” I said. “WHAT?!”
“I can’t get away,” he said. “We’ll have to go tomorrow.”
“No!” I said. “We have to go today! They’ll be gone tomorrow! It’s important!”
“It’s not important,” he said, looking straight at me.
“I’ve been waiting for two years and I’ve done all the research,” I said. “It’s important to me!”
As I left the kitchen, I added one more comment. “You’re mean!”
The conversation, not off to an admirable start (I think I’ve been hanging around too many kindergartners), only went south from there. Now, I normally pride myself on not whining, not begging, and not making people feeling guilty for things they have to do.
Not this time.
I pulled out all the stops. I mentioned the way my back feels like it’s broken every day. That I’m six months pregnant and still throwing up. I’m not sleeping well. I don’t ask for anything. I’ve been miserable for six months. I haven’t had any down time lately…
I know: Poor me, poor me, pour me a drink….(if only!!)
Anyway, as shameless as it all was, I guess G decided that losing two hours of work was not worth sending his pregnant wife over the edge for. In the end, he met me at the phone store and we each came away with the new iPhone 4S. I then spent the rest of the day and night as planned, loading my apps, learning the new features, playing around with the camera, and getting my old iPhone all set up for the kids with more games and learning activities.
Not my proudest day, to be sure. But sometimes a pregnant wife has to do what a pregnant wife has to do, and it isn’t always pretty. ;)
"Okay, you got your new phone, I'm posing for a picture...now will you please go away?"
Vincent couldn't understand why we wouldn't let him climb onto the boat this time.
There's G climbing up the ladder, back to work on refrigeration as soon as his annoying wife leaves the shipyard. :)
